Screwed up

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The CIA has developed a novel incentive to gain cooperation and support in Taliban-plagued Afghanistan: handing out libido-enhancing Viagra pills to targeted village patriots.

This is not only funny but also an ingenious tactic. The CIA should also be distributing Viagra (prescription and fee-free of course) to the Taliban. How would they be able to fight when their entire concentration is focused on finding a compatible chicken, sheep, cow or horse (of their persuasion) with which to consummate?

Besides, whether charging or retreating in battle with our troops, their efficiency is bound to be encumbered, what with the tripping hazard inherently encountered when running with an erection, or at least that’s been my experience, modesty aside.

Whoever thought up the brilliant prescription for this WDD, Weapon of Drug Destruction, deserves the Medal of Honor—of course, with a bow to Pfizer. It’s about time pharmaceutical giants diverted their attention from screwing the American public to help us screw our screwing enemy.

Viva Viagra!

NICHOLAS ZIZELISAmagansett

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